Posted by: Xhyra Graf | 20 October 2007

The barrel of a concept

21st Century Drow

Originally uploaded by Xhyra Graf.

I knew it would end badly the moment she used the words, “It’s just illogical.” I knew it would end badly even as I giggled inside at the incongruity of a woman using that term; even as I knew she raged at the religious establishment with almost the same intensity that I raged against the science establishment.

But she had pushed my button and as she spoke of contradiction, rewritings and paternalistic, authoritarian conspiracies I felt the mini-strokes begin. I felt the prickling annoyance of the past few years begin at the base of my skull; just as when I spent my time in the pit of hell entrenched in the reading of and listening to a people who have replaced God with logic – yet another Western, male driven concept – I felt the ague begin, that was the precursor of the bile I was barely able to keep down in order to get my degree. When she said something to effect of “unthinking sheep” a mini-stroke came full on and it was like red before a bull.

When did the genetically defunct portion of society – that cannot, will not see that the whole of the physical universe is encapsulated in a vision beyond our human vision regardless of how this “concept” is expressed – take over to the extent of causing a woman [said in an anxious, high pitched tone] to spew such nonsense with vitriolic vehemence?  I mean even to the extent of using male patterns of argument style.

The size of the Gun becomes the focal point of the picture in conversations like this and it shows that something has broken [or healed] within me that I did not just walk away this time as I usually do and looked straight down the barrel of it. Maybe it was the situation. All in all, the lesson today was that whilst I, of all people, understand the woman bashing foundation of current and organized versions of Christianity – I have breaking points.

Not in my house – Ne’ermore.

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